Wednesday, December 30, 2015

So long 2015...looking forward to a brighter, better 2016!

Well this has been a year...

One that tested our patience, faith, relationship and personal strength. In this previous post I filled you in on our journey to babies, and unfortunately the update is not what I hoped it would be.

In July, I had my 3rd miscarriage and as I write this I am waiting to schedule our 4th pregnancy to end. To face 2 miscarriages on Christmas, 2 years in a row, has been very difficult, especially when you add in our wedding anniversary on Dec 28th. Overall we have been trying for a year and a half with 4 m.c in the last year.

We have been seeing a fertility specialist for a year, and have done some testing that has revealed nothing. This current pregnancy has gone the furthest, I should be 9 weeks, although the baby has not developed to that level and while we had a heart beat last week, today there was not one. We see the Dr. tomorrow (NYE lol) to find out what we do to end this pregnancy - D and C or the pills.

I have felt numb, detached, and nearly inconsolable. 2015 should have been sponsored by Kleenex.

This should have been our announcement in January....
Pregnancy Annoucement winter


I share this because infertility and miscarriage loss is a lonely, lonely place. I have found a few bloggers who have shared their journey and I have found that the most comforting of all. (If you are interested check out A Slice of Style.) Although, we are also very lucky to have many amazing friends and family who have been very supportive. I believe the only way to survive such a trying experience is to be open, because this is not something you can get through on your own. Thank you to my family and friends who have been there for us this last year. I am sure they may have had no idea what to say, but you didn't need to,  just being there, giving a hug is all that we have needed.

So...now what? At our last appointment with the specialist we asked, if this doesn't work - then what? As the planner in me needed Plan B. He suggested that we move straight to IVF to ensure they can select an egg and sperm with the best chance at surviving. So I guess petrie dish baby or babies lol it is! I will update this blog with our IVF journey and possibly our road to adoption. Whatever it takes, we are in!

In the mean time we have something VERY exciting to look forward to! In 2 weeks we will be travelling to Singapore for the wedding of our very dear friends Shalini and Zee, followed by a whirlwind trip of Thailand, Cambodia and Hong Kong. This will be the perfect getaway and I cannot tell you how excited we are to visit with these dear friends and see them get married!

Goodbye 2015...you piece of sh*t lol...we welcome 2016 with open arms!


1 comment:

  1. Love this and you!
    You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. - AA Milne

    ReplyDelete